Ask-A-Slacker

I've returned.

So after a 2-3 month hiatus I have returned to the site that started it all. I'd like to thank some of you for returning to the site despite me being a complete ass and leaving you high and dry. What do you expect from a slacker, that's what I do best? Hopefully some of you will read this on your feeds and stop in and say something.
I have a question for some of you though; Would you like me to keep posting these kinds of topics every time (which will probably make it pretty rarely) or would you rather me post whatever I feel like. I know this is my blog and all, but I don't want to alienate some of the visitors that have stuck through all of this.
I have also taken down all the stupid advertisements. I'm sorry that I put those up in the first place, you won't see those type of links anymore.
We'll it's good to be back.
I'll post some more in the coming days, you can either comment of post in the tagboard as usual. I may get some extra writers on here as well to keep this place more active, so if any of you are interested use the same method as mentioned earlier and just comment on here. I'm off for the night, take care.

Slacker.

Benefits of the slacker lifestyle.

The Woman asks:

Does the slacker life have any real advantages over the more motivated lifestyles?





The slacker lifestyle can be very lucrative and rewarding. When I wake up in the afternoon do you know what I do? Look at myself in the mirror. Why? Not because I’m narcissistic I can assure you. It’s because it’s good to be me. So good in fact that I can only admire my figure and the look of confidence ever present on my face along with the way I get a chubby in the loins.
Everyday when you wake up in the morning, throw on your stuffy business suit, make yourself presentable and grab a coffee to go, how do you feel? Let me guess; like shit. Why? It's because you don’t have time to appreciate yourself. You probably feel like you are taken for granted and you are probably correct in this assumption.
Being a slacker can be very rewarding. If I’m hungry I can walk to the fridge and grab a hot pocket, if I’m tired I go back to sleep, I never have any appointments, I don’t have to be a suck up or a kiss-ass. How does it feel to be motivated? Do you feel good getting up at the crack of dawn to work a 8-12 hour shift at a place you dislike?
The only downside to being a slacker is that I have to wait for holidays to collect on gifts to have any extra cash in my pocket. I spend very little, so $100 can last me a longer amount of time than you would expect. I feel that’s an acceptable trade for peace of mind and freedom to do whatever pleases me whenever I want.

My favorite movie and why?

The Man asked:

What is your favorite movie and why?



This is largely an opinion based question. If I was to base my answer on the general population I would choose The Godfather. Personally, I thought the movie was sub-par. The way I see it 80% of the world’s population are sheep’s. It’s why someone like Paris Hilton can get away with some of the ridiculous shit that she does. That and for some reason people think she is attractive; to me she looks like a rat with her pointy nose and beady eyes. This is how when a famous rapper is on cribs showing off some part of his room and he points to his large poster of Scarface or The Godfather and says that it’s his favorite movie so many fan-boy sheep decide that it too is their favorite movie. I’m guessing that some of those people have never even watched either of those movies.

If I want to hold the slacker ideal in mind I would probably choose a movie like Mallrats or anything else by Kevin Smith. He has a knack for writing characters that have their faults but are still loveable and humorous. While I love these types of movies, I can’t say in good conscious that they are my favorite. If I had to choose one film, I guess it would be Pulp Fiction. I’m a large fan of Quentin Tarantino’s work and the characters in it are completely original from any other film out there. It’s seems like one of those films that is under appreciated even though it has a lot of fans. I especially like the casting for the film; Samuel L. Jackson, John Travolta, Bruce Willis, and Uma Thurman just to name a few. Really just an all-star cast, and a very solid and at times hilarious film.

I would love to hear what some of your favorite movies are and also an opinion about my choice I suppose. Feel free to use either the comments or the tagboard.

Music you should probably quit life for...

Jenkem: Don't say I didn't warn you.

I've decided to take a small break today from the questions, but in the mean time I figured I would share with you something that you've probably not seen before. Let me warn you, it's disturbing and not recommended for anyone with an uneasy stomach.

I present to you Jenkem:


JenkemClick the image for the full view.

What are your initial feelings toward this?


Also, I've invited one of my friends to start posting on here. This should benefit the site as well as you readers with more content. Woofatsally should be posting here later today.

Temporary downtime

Hey sorry if anyone tried to visit the site and was unable to access it. I transfered the blog to a different account so that the new layout would work properly, unfortunately I lost all the comments that you have all given me. Either way, I removed any of the unnecessary posts and now I am going to tweak with the layout a bit more. Expect a new article to be up later today when I get a chance to put some finishing touches on it, and thanks to everyone who has been supportive whether it be through questions, comments or even just visiting. I promise that things will get better with time as I get accustomed to everything and stop making mistakes.

Are there girls on the internet?

Gremlin asked: Are there girls on the internet?


Girls on the internet are a very popular topic, with many guys feeling strongly towards there being none and if there are they are most certainly ugly. This couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, the way I see it, every single person on the internet other than me is in fact a Victoria’s Secret supermodel with plans to seduce me. The way I see it, you asking me this question is a means for you to see if I have figured out your clever ploy.

In the beginning I believed the facade that you had all set up; that I wasn't the only male on the intranets. It was clever the way that all of you set up forums on sports, discussions about video games, action movie descriptions and others on all sorts of “manly” topics.

All along it was actually millions of highly attractive, incredibly classy, and I can only hope horny women actively participating in the slow seduction of myself. Bravo ladies, I commend you for your attempts. I understand that you have all grown quite fond of me through years of active pursuit of luring me into your homes with promises of beer, and free pay-per-view, but I can’t pick just one of you.

That’s why I have decided to host a large royal rumble type event. Every girl will be given booty shorts and white t-shirts. No bras allowed. Inside the enormous kiddy pool will be a mixture or KY Jelly and Jell-O. Kissing, hugging, groping, scissoring and other signs of affection are allowed, and you will also be allowed to “gang up” on each other. The last one standing will have the honor of being my fuck buddy/house cleaner. These are the rules, and you must all participate.



If you have a question please use the tagboard or contact me through my email. Thanks.


Add to your feed: